Real Bumper Stickers Seen Throughout the Nation:
1) Horn broken. Watch for finger.
2) Your kid`s an honors student, but you're an idiot.
3) Jesus is coming, Look busy!.
4) Smash head on keyboard to continue..
5) In politics, stupidity is not a handicap.
6) Learn from your parent's mistakes, use birth control.
7) Big government...the opiate of the people.
8) Beauty is in the eye of the BEER holder.
9) He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
10) Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
11) Your gene pool need some chlorine.
12) Auntie Em, Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog, Love Dorothy.
13) Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
14) Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.
15) Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
16) Man who farts in church sits in pew.
17) The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
18) Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
19) Had a life...Got a modem.
20) I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.
21) Lead me not into temptation. I know the way.
22) Your village called. They`re missing an idiot.
23) Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
24) I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
25) OK, who stopped payment on my reality check?
26) Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it.
27) I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
28) Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.
29) Time is the best teacher, too bad it kills all its students.
30) A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
31) Don`t drink and drive. You might spill your drink.
32) Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.
33) Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
34) Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
35) i souport publik edekashun.
36) Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
37) Ever stop to think...and forget to start again?
38) Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
39) Can`t be me love but a hooker will do.
40) Will work for MONEY.
42) Jesus is coming and boy is he pissed.
43) I still miss my ex but my aim has improved.
44) The more you complain, the longer God make you live.
45) Forgive and forget just keep a list of names.
46) Where there`s a will.....I want to be in it.
*** I cannot claim credit for creating the humorous sayings on this page. They have been gleened from different places on the internet.